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Understanding Why Older Couples Choose Grey DivorceGrey divorce, also known as Silver Splitter or Diamond Divorcees, refers to the older “grey-haired” couples who decide to file for divorce after being in long-term marriages.

According to the Pew Research Center, a study conducted by the National Center for Health Statistics and U.S. Census Bureau found that for every 1,000 married couples aged 50 and over, 10 of them ended in divorce.

Grey divorce entails many issues a traditional divorce carries, such as the division of marital property and assets and spousal maintenance, but is unlikely to include the allocation of parental responsibilities or child support.

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Tips for Surviving the Holidays After a DivorceGoing through a divorce is tough, but going through a divorce during the holidays can add to the hurt.

If this is your first holiday season since separating from your spouse, it is natural to feel lonely and sad. It is important to not let these emotions control you and prevent you from enjoying the holidays. Here are a few tips and tricks to help you maintain your mental health and manage your stress throughout the holidays:

  1. Take It One Day at a Time: It is only natural to want to rush through a time in your life that you would rather not be present for. Remain focused on the here and now, and take each holiday as it comes.
  2. Do Not Skip Out on Spending Time with Family and Friends: As much as you want to spend time alone, your family and friends are your support system and people you should lean on during this hard time. If an invite is offered, take it.
  3. Volunteer Your Time: The holidays are about giving, and volunteering at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter will take your focus off of your problems. Helping others who are less fortunate than you will make you realize how much you have to be grateful for.
  4. Make New Traditions: Avoid dwelling on the traditions you lost or will lose because of the divorce, and make some new ones. There is no better time than the present to begin anew.
  5. Take a Break from Social Media: Scrolling through social media and seeing other people’s “perfect lives” will only make you feel worse. Delete any social media app you may be tempted to use, and enjoy your mini social media cleanse. 
  6. Do Not Numb the Pain: Indulging in drugs or alcohol may seem like a quick and easy way to forget what you are going through, even if it is for a short amount of time. When emotions are high, mixing pleasure and pain can lead to tears, angry outbursts or worse. If you plan to drink, set a limit and stick to it. 

According to the American Psychological Association, there is a difference between being sad during the holidays because of personal issues and a serious emotional or mental condition. If you believe your holiday blues are lasting longer than the holiday season, immediately contact a healthcare professional.

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Top Ten Things You Should Never Do During a DivorceDivorce is a common challenge that people face in their lives. According to the Illinois Department of Public Health, 75,131 couples got married, while 26,132 got divorced in 2016. 

Tensions run high, and it is easy to find yourself doing or saying things that can cause additional issues. Listed below are the top ten things you should steer clear of doing during your divorce: 

  1. Do Not Post on Social Media: Nothing is private on the internet. Avoid Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and any other social media outlet during your divorce, as anything and everything can be used as evidence against you.
  2. Do Not Take It Out on Your Child(ren) or Family Members: It is important to keep your behavior and attitude in check during this tough time. Your friends and family are your biggest support.
  3. Do Not Neglect Getting An Attorney: A divorce attorney can help file paperwork, review and explain anything you may not understand, and direct you through the court system. Do not handle it on your own.
  4. Do Not Try To Hide Money Or Assets: Being petty and hiding money and/or assets can hurt your case and ruin your chances of getting what you want in the end.
  5. Do Not Forget About Your Taxes: A divorce will change your tax-filing status. Before you file after the divorce, you must come to an agreement with your ex-spouse on how to file and what each of you will claim.
  6. Do Not Jump Into Another Romantic Relationship: Bringing a new love interest into your life during a divorce can further complicate things. Remaining single during this tough time is best for your emotional and mental health.
  7. Do Not Rack Up Debt: Divorce is not cheap. Purchasing things to start over will not be cheap. Be sure to budget your money wisely and set some aside for future purchases. 
  8. Do Not Get Pregnant Or Impregnate Someone Else: This should be a no-brainer, as it can complicate issues regarding child support and the allocation of parental responsibilities.
  9. Do Not Turn To Drugs Or Alcohol: Numbing the heartache with substances may seem like a good option but can ruin your chances of receiving fair parenting time if it impairs your ability to be a responsible parent.
  10. Do Not Refuse To Communicate With Your Ex-Partner: Additional legal fees can arise if the silent treatment persists. As a result, decisions may need to be made by a third party.

Contact a Will and DuPage County Divorce Lawyer Today

You need someone who will protect you, your child(ren), and your assets during your divorce. Schedule a consultation with a Joliet, Illinois, divorce attorney at The Foray Firm by calling 312-702-1293.

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Posted on in Divorce

Filing an Uncontested Divorce in IllinoisContrary to what you see in movies and television shows, settling your divorce case in court is almost always a last resort. Illinois courts highly encourage couples to try to make decisions pertaining to their divorce on their own without outside intervention. Not only does that save you time and money, but it also allows you to keep the control in your hands and enables you to decide your own future. Some couples have tried to avoid going to court and are unable to come to their own resolutions, but most couples see the benefit of settling their divorce outside of court or filing for an uncontested divorce.

What is an Uncontested Divorce?

Almost all divorces contain the same issues that must be settled before the divorce can be completed. These issues include:

An uncontested divorce occurs when couples can come to an agreement on these issues without having to go to court multiple times and involve a judge. Therefore, in the simplest terms, an uncontested divorce is a divorce that is settled without the intervention of a judge or court.

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How are College Expenses Handled During a Divorce?College is not cheap. Since the 1980s, college tuition costs have risen more than 200 percent for public universities across the country, making covering the expense of higher education more difficult than ever. Because of this, young adults are living with their parents longer than any generation prior to them. For parents getting a divorce, paying for their children’s college education can be a point of contention during the divorce negotiations. Fortunately, Illinois law has included provisions in the Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act (IMDMA) on how post-secondary education expenses are distributed between parents.

Covering the Costs

The IMDMA allows courts to allocate costs to either or both parents based on a variety of factors. The judge can order that property allocated to either spouse during the asset division process be used to pay for post-secondary education, either now or when the time comes. Child support payments can also be extended beyond when the child turns 18 for the purpose of paying for college. A variety of things can be included in college costs, as long as the costs are accrued before the child’s 23rd birthday, or in some cases, the child’s 25th birthday. These costs can include:

  • A prep course for a standardized college entrance exam
  • Two standardized college entrance exam fees
  • Fees for up to five college applications
  • Tuition and fees
  • Housing expenses and meal plans
  • Medical insurance and dental expenses
  • Reasonable living expenses for the child
  • Books and supplies 

Who Pays for What?

As mentioned before, either parent or both parents can be held responsible for paying for the costs related to the child’s college education. If the parents cannot come to an agreement as to how these costs will be covered, it will be up to the judge to decide for them. The judge will make his or her decision based on a variety of factors, including:

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